Did We Really Mean to Teach That?

Originally Published October 2015

Have you ever listened in our your kids and they say something that makes you cringe and think, “Did they learn that from me?”  I hate to admit it, but that has happened to me.   Kids really do watch us and learn from us.  

It’s no different at school.

Recently I was visiting one of our elementary classes and the students were discussing an experience in which they had participated.  They were challenged to consider whether they were thoughtful in their words and actions during the experience or whether they had just said and done the first thing that popped into their heads.  One very insightful young man said, “ I think we learn that from our parents.  I mean, they just want us to get things done.”  I realized right away that I sent the same message to my kids. “Just get the bookbag packed!  Hurry up and put the toys away! Come on! Brush your teeth and let’s go!”

I decided that if I as a parent have sometimes taught a lesson that I didn’t intend, then we might have done that in school too.  So I took the opportunity to ask the students if we have ever sent the same, “just get it done” message in school.  You know what?  We have!

These very deep thinkers told me that at times they have felt that they were supposed to do what the teacher said, they way the teacher told them, and they weren’t to think for themselves about how to go about a project or lesson. Ouch!  But they also went on to say that what they are experiencing in their class right now is different. They are expected to think and to think about their thinking.  Their interests matter.  They are allowed to have input into their learning.  And they love it!

Whew!  We are on the right track!

This exchange with these thoughtful young people reinforced our commitment to a culture of enrichment, thinking skills, problem and project-based learning, creativity, and student interest.   We have started this work at our elementary schools, but we are committed to these areas for all of our students.  To be successful, we need the support of our parents, and we need to grow our own skills at teaching thinking.  One young man in the group told me.  “We have been trained to think.”  Yes!  We are growing thinkers…PreK – 12!  All kids.  All the time.