A Graduation Message

Originally Published May 2023

There is a beautiful picture book by Alison McGhee and Peter H. Reynolds. The book is titled, Someday (2007). It is a parent’s story. It is a story of truth and a story of love.

One day I counted your fingers and kissed each one.

One day the first snowflakes fell, and I held you up and watched them melt on your baby skin.

One day we crossed the street and you held my hand tight.

Then, you were my baby, and now you are my child.

Sometimes, when you sleep, I watch you dream, and I dream too…

That someday you will dive into the cool, clear water of a lake.

Someday you will walk into a deep wood.

Someday your eyes will be filled with a joy so deep that they shine.

Someday you will run so fast and so far your heart will feel like fire.

Someday you will swing high - so high, higher than you ever dared to swing.

Someday you will hear something so sad that you will fold up with sorrow.

Someday you will call a song to the wind, and the wind will carry your song away.

Someday I will stand on this port and watch your arms waving to me until I no longer see you.

Someday you will look at this house and wonder how something that feels so big can look so small.

Someday you will feel a small weight against your strong back.

Someday I will watch you brushing your child’s hair.

Someday, a long time from now, your own hair will glow silver in the sun.

And when that day comes, love, you will remember me.

As we enter graduation season, we appropriately turn our attention to the graduates. We celebrate their accomplishments and look forward to their next steps. We give them a place of honor in our families, and we shine a light on them because this is their season.

But for those of you who parented these graduates, I want to take a moment to honor you. You who counted and kissed their fingers. You, who held their hands as they took first steps. You, who watched them sleep and wished for them to achieve all of their dreams. This time of year is for you as well. One of the joys and stresses of graduation for the graduates is the changes that are taking place. Leaving the safety of the school environment. The uncertainty of new challenges and new journeys. But you are changing too. When the child that you raised steps across the stage, your role changes. Your life changes. It is wonderful and scary all at the same time.

Just like your graduate, you have to make adjustments especially when the graduation is from high school, and even more so if you are celebrating your first graduate. Embrace the change. Reflect on the amazing job that you have done raising your child. Celebrate the person your child has become. And then think about you and how this pivotal moment for them is a pivotal moment of opportunity for you too. 

What will you do now that your role is changing? What new challenges or adventures will you embark upon? What song will you call out to the wind? Whatever you do, know that you have done something incredible these past 18 or so years; you have done something that your graduate probably doesn’t fully understand. But one day, someday, you and all you have done, will be remembered.